We tried to watch a DVD
on my huge HD TV
But then the screen would slightly flicker
and soon we all began to bicker.
Pulling leads, head down the back
treading on the howling cat
it seemed to be working until I
poked the lead into my eye.
We tugged on this and then on that
wiggling everything down the back
A flash of light, and then a hiss
– this was a film we couldn’t miss.
The picture was a fuzzy freeze
when the vase fell off the mantlepiece.
The wedding photo too, and ‘CRACK’!
It also landed down the back!
We trampled over broken glass
and then my child began to laugh when
we plunged into darkness like a rocket
as the lamp plug came out of the socket.
The cat was trembling in the hall
As the oversized screen began to fall
In slow-mo we all saw it tipping
over towards my pile of knitting.
In horror, as one, we lunged half-crazed
Miraculously, the thing was saved
Crumpled, I gave a sigh of relief
and then began to sob in grief
at how defeated I can be
by this confounded technology.
Still weeping loudly, I was told
by my precocious 5 year old
“Oh mummy, really, don’t you know
that if you want to see the show,
you push this little button here…”
And wouldn’t you know, the screen was clear!